Being Manic & Getting on Schedule
Hey y'all! Today I wanted to talk about a few things including what happens when I'm manic and my attempt to getting myself on a schedule! I also posted an instagram photo of one of the pieces of art I'm working on that I started when I was manic. As you can see, it's very detailed and intricate; it sort of mirrors what my mind is like when I'm manic...there's a lot going on lol.
So, the past few days have been stable (or more so than usual rather) but I was dealing with mania yesterday and figured I should talk about what it's like. This is just my personal experience with it, other people have different experiences with mania.
The first thing that happens is I get a lot of energy, which can feel great because I usually don't have a lot of energy. I feel upbeat and super happy usually, although I can also feel very irritable and start fighting with people on other days of mania. Yesterday, I just felt very happy. I started doing a ton of projects, including creating multiple new blogs and new art projects and new writing projects. It was all too too much, but I don't recognize that while I'm manic. It was a blur yesterday of me frantically working. I also was talking quite a lot and very fast, which is another symptom of mania. Needless to say, I was super tired at the end of the day and my mom pointed out that I was manic and that I can't handle all of the projects I was working on. I decided to delete the new blogs I made, and focus just on this blog, my one poetry book, and my art for zazzle. That's enough variety but not too much to overwhelm me.
I always feel embarrassed when I stop being manic and I know I shouldn't but I always am. But I'm being gentle with myself today and not letting myself overdo it again. It's hard to manage mania, but I try. That's a little bit about my mania!
Last night I decided to make a doable schedule for me to follow. I used to have no schedule and flew by the seat of my pants everywhere and everyday. It's exhausting, tiring, and so chaotic. So, I decided to create a schedule that I can follow each day and help myself stay grounded. Otherwise, I get side tracked and distracted by everything and it makes me fall into mania easier. I enlisted my very organized mom's help and together we came up with my schedule! I basically just made sure I had time for my hygiene, cleaning, work, errands, nap, and winding down/relaxing. I don't want to jam too much in and make myself crazier than usual lol.
What's your schedule like? I'd love to know! Hope y'all are doing well and I'll talk to ya soon!
Alette
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