Always Anxious

"The Mirror" by Sir Francis Bernard Dicksee

It's the weekend! Yay! I've just been spending time with family and getting ready to celebrate my mom's birthday! I have to say though, I've really been battling my anxiety lately. 

I've dealt with anxiety literally since I was a little girl. I can't remember the last time when I wasn't worrying about something or anxious about the future or random issues. Over the years and with help of medication and lots of therapy, I've learned to manage my anxiety and live with it. There is no magic pill to make it go away (well, legally anyway) so I've learned to cope with it. 

But lately, it's been so bad! I constantly feel on edge for no reason and I really only have an hour window of being able to be out in public before I start freaking out and getting really uncomfortable. I started seeing a new psychiatrist last month and she prescribed a stronger anti anxiety med for me, so I've been waiting for it to build in my system and start working. I pray it starts working.

So far, I haven't had any panic attacks this month which is fantastic. I had two really bad ones a few months ago and ended up throwing up and nearly passing out. It's an awful way to live when that can happen at any moment, in public or private. 

I guess this post is mainly me complaining, but I also just want to let anyone else suffering from anxiety know that they are not alone. It sucks, BIG time, but you're not alone and you're stronger than you think. If you're going through a hard time with it right now, here's a *hug* and I'll pray for you. Things always get better though, it just stinks that we sometimes have to go through a really rough period before things get better. 

I am looking forward to tomorrow though, we're celebrating my mom's birthday tomorrow and the next day is her actual birthday. I've got some gift wrapping to do! I hope y'all are having a relaxing weekend and I'll see ya soon :)

Alette